if you're reading this, you're either
a) visiting this blog for the first time
b) bored
c) trying to practice your reading skills
d) jeremiah marvelling at his genius
e) a retard who doesn't realise the symbols on the left are links

Friday, December 31, 2004 [[]]


alright. just received a letter from boon lay citizen's consultative committee, or whatever that is. the education bursary i was eligible for getting top 25% for something came through and i get to have my school fees paid-for for one year. haha, not much, but something i guess, considering right now both my parents aren't working. the ceremony's on sunday next week. can you believe it, having to wear my school uniform *sigh* on a sunday *double sigh*.

and my singnet broadband start up kit arrived, reminding me of my brand new internet service come 5th jan. yay.

and my class is combining with t22 next year, though 22 would be the one whose identity would be scrapped. t10 remains, not that i guess it matters though, sigh. alot of people retained or got kicked out this year and i guess that sucks. and...

NO MORE NATHAN.

after 1 year, whew. never thought i'll make it out alive.

still, even after all this good news, something's missing. you! =)

"I know you're out there, somewhere out there..." - Our Lady Peace


`donovan. |11:19 PM|

[[]]


ok. i spend the 29th to the 31st away from home. let's see where i went. after facil camp ended at around 6.30pm on the 29th, i made my way home and packed and went to derek's house to sleepover. almost got lost in the middle of kallang area trying to get to his house, haha. when i stepped into his room, i finally found someone whose room is worse than mine! and to think, my room is considered quite clean by some and my mom still hounds me on it. we spent the night tcc-ing and playing his xbox, namely soul caliber 2, soul caliber 2, some airplane game and more soul caliber 2. we packed the next morning and since we woke up late, we left the house only at 11. we took a cab down and met the rest of them at the mrt station. at the chalet, we basically did five things.

1) play HALO2 on Xbox
2) play soul caliber 2 on Xbox
3) play cards
4) talk and eat
5) play more soul caliber 2 on Xbox

on the 30th night, the guys went out to drink and, as i found out later, play pool while viggy and i were stuck inside the chalet guarding the bags and playing mroe soul caliber 2. so amidst talking on the phone, sms-ing and playing soul caliber 2, i knocked out early. guess facil camp was just too tiring. so in the end, 13 of so people cramped into the room and derek complained that i pushed him off the mattress at night, haha.

at the end of it all, fun with t19 and 20, met my brothers and pido again, had a good time with clarrisa, making her scared of playign 21 with me with my insane bets of 2 dollars, lost 6 dollars to xuan rui (remind me never to play with him again), talked with pido, cheryl (about nonsense) and mr kwee (about what to expect for next year's class changes and all). thanks all of you for a good time! =)


`donovan. |1:26 PM|

Tuesday, December 28, 2004 [[]]


just can't get this song's tune outta my head: In Loving Memory - Alterbridge. =)

i'm dead tired after 2 day sof orientation. today, the facils were allowed to go home after outdoor activities ended at 11, but as usual, councilors went back to school from kallang and put up banners and hold comm meetings. anti-zhao is coming along nicely. *grin* so, like monday, i left school at around 6 to 7, reaching home around 7 plus to 8. although i slept at 9 monday night and woke up at 6.45, i still feel that i'm dead tired, lacking sleep. the 1 hour of sleep i got from sunday night didn't help of course, what with all the tiring activities and all. *yawn*. then still gotta prepare for the chalet, which i haven't asked my parents yet whether i can go. *gulp* ah wells. hope i can go. they'll surely complain i haven't touched my school work, which is true, from a certain point of view haha.

damn, you know i'm tired when i ramble on about unrelated stupid everyday stuff.


`donovan. |10:34 PM|

Monday, December 27, 2004 [[]]


just for the record: i mopped the floor till 1 am, then started work compiling and organizing the facil booklet so that it's properly done up for the facils, factoring in some last minute changes and all. i worked till now, 5, 30am. *yawn*. the things i do for council. =P 1 hour of sleep before i've to wake up to go to school for the training camp. sigh. if you take pity on me, tag my board. i'm bored.


`donovan. |5:22 AM|

Saturday, December 25, 2004 [[]]


just testing this new photo uploading service and checking it out! =)



posing in india

::echoes::

MERRY CHRISTMAS ALL!


...............................*

.............................': ; '

...........................':,.';*^@

.......................,:^*.;".@_;%

....................,_;*:;#.*;*:;:;*@:&

.............................||||


there! by the way, it's supposed to be a christmas tree. in case it really looks that bad.



`donovan. |10:51 PM|

Friday, December 24, 2004 [[*a white christmas]]


merry christmas all! crap, all my friends aren't free. they're busy celebrating. they've made plans already. ah well, another festive season spent with good ole popcorn, soda, and the tube in my living room. and great, my dad finally made the switch from starhub cable internet to singtel's adsl today. hopefully, my internet won't be as screwed up as it is now. oh and i got an iPod Mini. wee.

let's check off my xmas wish list.

1) iPod Mini.
2) peace of mind. (well, sorta.)
3) suddenly bestowed filthy stinking rich.
4) her.

now, two outta four ain't that bad now ain't it? =)


"All I want for christmas is...you."

just...




`donovan. |9:47 PM|

[[]]


god help me. it's 2 am in the morning, and i'm only halfway through writing the stupid orientation facil booklet. i'm half sleepy, half frustrated at the lousy computer crashing on me and losing my work while i'm attempting to make the document neat and talk to cheryl online who seems to be the only person who's responding at this unearthly hour. and even she lags. busy writing cards. while i'm stuck doing this. wee. facils-who-are-gonna-use-this-book: you better appreciate this booklet!





or else.



*evil grin* =)


`donovan. |2:05 AM|

Wednesday, December 22, 2004 [[]]


<sub>Somewhere theres speaking
Its already coming in
Oh and its rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now youre here and you dont know why
But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who wont return

Hes everything you want
Hes everything you need
Hes everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you dont know why

Youre waiting for someone
To put you together
Youre waiting for someone to push you away
Theres always another wound to discover
Theres always something more you wish hed say

But youll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
Its only what youre asking for
And youll be just fine
With all of your time
Its only what youre waiting for
Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who wont return

I am everything you want
I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
I say all the right things
At exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you and I dont know why
And I dont know why
Why
I dont know</sub>

::echoes::

i feel surprised. i feel shocked.
i feel bad i've hurt you.
i feel stupid for not having seen it coming.
i need time.

::echoes::

i need you. i want you.
i need to learn patience.
as time goes by, i think i'm confirming this.
i'm right in choice.
now i need to let things slide.

i don't feel good at all. help. i hate loneliness. it's stifling.


`donovan. |10:22 PM|

Monday, December 20, 2004 [[*neither here nor there]]


lol. haven't been using this alot lately. i've been listening to (brace yourselves) quite abit of jap and chinese songs lately! don't ask me what came over me, maybe just got tired of the same old rock, metal and angsty music. the upbeat of the jap songs and the melody and lyrics of the chinese songs are the in thing for me right now. and since i'm like just filling this space with a hell lotta nonsense, let's just recap how i spent these few days.

saturday: gughan came over to bunk at my place until tuesday since his family's away in malaysia. after lunch, we went to lulu's house to play abit of computer. funny thing was he wasn't even in! haha. imagine calling at your friend's palce to use his computer when he isnt even home. we rushed down to outram to meet ben tay, marcus goh, shamus, clarrisa, derek, pido and two other MI girls. gughan, louis and i thought we were late and thus rushed to outram by 5. we got a call from ben saying they'll be late so we walked down until we reached chinatown where we stoned till 6. we then walked back to outram and reached at 6 plus. we waited somemore until they rfinally arrvied at 7, 2 freaking hours late. at the 'party', we were like the only youth there la! anyway, we went crazy even though the rest were either children or adults. between stealing food from the table and dancing away on the dance floor i guess we had a reasonably good time. not to mention our main aim: supporting ben tay for his RnB hip hop performance.

sunday: in the morning went down to practice on my 'wife' electric guitar techniques at sanjay's. after that, went to support *fragile (derek, wee koon, cheryl, joshua) at wee koon's church event where there was a competition amongst bands. i thought they sounded pretty good to me, better than the first band (if you could call one guitarist, singer and drummer a band), and the last one i heard before leaving early, the 'wanna-be-alterbridge' band. god you should hear their singer! even looking at him, i didn't guess he was the singer. he looks so.. ah beng. then his chinese accent made the song sound weird. "when they open their [ice]" was his pronounciation. yucks. he spoilt my favourite song. anyway, fragile didnt make even third from what i heard, sigh. =( ah well. after that, i rushed down to meet bro roberts from the india OCIP trip for dinner.

monday: today, it's a slow day to say the least. morning had council again to learn the bhangra couple mass dance. it's a slow night where i feel content after jogging around jurong and eating home cooked food (yum). and so here i am, filling up this space.

i feel. alright.


`donovan. |9:53 PM|

Saturday, December 18, 2004 [[]]


everything i do, i do it for you. [robin hood]

do i still believe? maybe. i feel like i'm starting to turn back to my non cynical self whenever i'm around you. good or bad?

_{hard to say.}


`donovan. |11:22 AM|

Friday, December 17, 2004 [[]]


the mind's fickle. and you're the drug i crave. with you i'm high. without, i'm dry. gee, that rhymes! it'll help if my heart and your seeming behaviour wasn't so fickle.

_{I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you}

wee. digging up the corpses.


`donovan. |11:22 PM|

Wednesday, December 15, 2004 [[*swirling vortex of void]]


you know. i've learnt to be grateful for small favours. given what's been thrown at me this whole year: coping with a new cca council, my ups and downs of my feelings, the As, and not-a-very-fun year in class, i've got it good already now. this whole end of the year has been fairly good to me in fact. i've managed to get by in council, become more mature in dealing and understanding my feelings, got fairly decent though not necessarily the best grades, went for fun and eye opening trips like India OCIP and Farmland and found a new class to hang out with (thank you t19!).

now what's only bugging me is the fact that the holidays are drawing to a close, and i haven't started consolidating my work, or my holiday homework. Or that i haven't been finding time to fence. Or that i'm just starting on electric guitar and though i wanna get good fast, i'm stuck at this beginner stage. (yeah i know: duh.) Or that orientation is BIG and i don't want the council to screw this up; we've come so far and all major events executed by us i.e. Teachers' Day and Grad Night have been a success. Or that i still don't know what to do with my feelings for her. you'll think that after nearly two months i would have been able to decide what to do about them, or at least forget about being more than just a friend. i'm just so goddamned afraid to be turned away, burnt, rejected, etc etc again. so for now, i'm just drifting on a directionless course with you. i'll take it as it comes. maybe it's still too soon to decide anyway. i won't know. i'm confused.

but amidst all this, i'll say that recently, i haven't had much of either moods: up or down. Usually i'm wildly high (which is very rare though), or i'm down in the pits like i've been there all my life (which is irritatingly very common). Recently though i find that i haven't been high, as usual, but i haven't been down either. Down in the pits anyway, since occasional bouts of depression are like, normal, i think. haha. so yeah, been feeling void really. not high, but not down. void in my heart, but not sad. just.

devoid of all feelings.

haha, so after this stock taking, i guess i feel a lil better after letting it out. wasn't down just now, but now i'm feeling slightly happier. but then again, this is all getting a lil mushy and all. why do you care so much about my inner stuff anyway? haha, this world's funny. everyone goes around cold and all, but in reality they're really just displaying a shell to the outside world, one which is meant to protect. if it's meant to protect, why do you hurt yourself so each time you close up and hide your inner feelings? ahh, food for thought there.

::echoes::

<sub>regarding you: it's still early to tell i guess. it's been two months, almost. and by now, i still don't know what i truly feel regarding you. i pray that it's just a passing crush that i can easily swipe aside so that i won't run the risk of getting rejected later. but each passing day that i go on and think of you here and there, regardless of time or place, i dread that this time, it may not be just a crush and it may be true. i remind myself that i shouldn't be thinking of you in that way, and that may just scare you away, but this is the truth which i'm not lying to myself. if anything, lies and not truth are the culprits that hurt people, just in ways not as obvious as truths do. so what am i to do? just chill i guess. true, the feeling's not as strong as the first day i saw you. i don't feel that strongly whenever i see you now. but you haunt my every thought whenever i'm away from you as much as you did since that first day. god, this is so...complicated and... if you're reading this, i never intended for this to happen the way it did. and i don't ever want to change the nature of our friendship. for now anyway. until i know better. until my heart stops playing tricks on my mind.

tired of this all.</sub>


`donovan. |7:38 PM|

Sunday, December 12, 2004 [[]]


because pido told me so.


`donovan. |9:59 PM|

Friday, December 10, 2004 [[*moo]]


let's see, since it's about time i did a recount for at least ONE trip i went for. India was far too long for me to blog down, so i guess it's up to me to write about farmland.

ayer hitam, i think. that's the name of the place we went to, somewhere in Johor. we started off with a mountain climb which was rather bracing and reminded me of the fun of climbing mountains like that. bukit timah hill can't exactly be counted as exciting, heck it's not even considered a 'bukit'. at least in my eyes. i still think mt ophir was harder in it's own way, but then again that was when i was in sec 3 and i was far weaker than i am now. i helped the girls shan, cheryl, shufang and jean up the mountain since i was more used to such climbing and took my place in front with the slower climbers. cheryl had had a loose knee cap and i think she had some problem climbing the parts which involved a big step upward. apparently huishan was also looking up for so long her neck ached and later couldnt even turn, haha! =) that's a first. when we reached the summit it was pretty cool and all, literally, though unlike ophir we weren't above the clouds. pity. though we did manage to catch a glimpse of a far off area which had rain falling from the darker clouds and it was amazing seeing rain falling in the distance away. following that we reached the campsite and settled down to our home for 2 nights. the first night was ok i guess, for a life in a tent, though sleeping and living with two giants in that confined space takes some getting used to. (sorry ivan and gabriel haha)

the program for the next day was sooo wonderful. hmm, in case you didn't get that, that was sarcasm. we opened with canoeing in the morning, which was fun and all since i was with the instructor for that duration and two proficient canoeists together make for a fun team where we can sprint and paddle in sync. though i must admit, i hate the puchi (insect in tamil) inside. there was a hell lot of goddamned insects inside! ants, spiders and god knows what other kidns of insects not documented by science yet. disgusting shit. and i thought singaporean canoes were dirty enough with sea water and sand constantly inside. i take back my words man.

*P.S. the next section's pretty long and just about me griping about a shit hole. if you wanna, just skip to the next paragraph yeah*

but then, the day got much better after that. hmm, in case you didn't get that again, that too was sarcasm. we later had to get into this pond (how can they evne term it a pond? by all appearances, and smell, it looked like untreated sewage to me) and construct a raft to take us across from one end to the other. the materials given us were rope, two big plastic drums, 7 short wooden poles and 5 long ones. thank god for ivan and derek who followed me into the girl group. one was a boy scout before and the other in ODAC. at least they knew how to tie knots. we eventually made our raft and it sounded good in theory, able to float well, low CG and all that. it came down to selection of who had the glorious (need i say also dubious?) honour of paddling the raft to the other side. the criteria was one guy, and one girl. the pair of other guys simultaneously looked at me when i announced my weight. i swear they looked almost hungry as they volunteered me to get on the raft. so me, the lightest among the trio, found myself volunteered for service to enter the stinking bog. they found the girl with the matching weight: huishan. i was up till then very sporting and calm until i stepped off the land and into the water and the embankment to get onto the raft. my feet sank into the mud below. yes, boys and girls, you heard me. mud. and nooo, not your average mud. your goey, grey viscous mud which sucks. yes, you heard me, and i meant for the pun. i almost lost my shoe in it. i needed someone to pull me back up onto the land. i couldn't free myself from the damn thing. i lost it then. and started to swear a lil. just a lil. i got back up on land and tried to board the raft again. this time huishan and i managed to get on alright, but to our combined horror, all the theory about it being stable was just bullshit. we were sitting upright and we found that it was so goddamned UNSTABLE. yes, it was so unstable that huishan started screaming and i started my full fledged swearing with my extensive multi-lingual vocabulary. english, chinese, hokkien, malay, tamil, hindi and german all came flowing out as we attempted to stablize the damn thing. and great, we were hardly two meters from shore. so i ceased my litany and suggested to huishan, look, why don't we ease slowly to prone position and hug the drum and paddle with our hands. yes, our hands, when we had a 2 meter pole as an intended oar. so slowly, while trying to keep a low CG and not rock the boat, pun intended, we eased into that position and precariously started paddling with our hands and made very, very slow progress. every now and then i would tell her to lean forward or backward to compensate for the drum starting to capsize. we made it to the opposite bank and i got off, happy as hell that i managed not to capsize. then came the bomb: the instructor told us to get the raft back to the shore we started from. i ran out of curse words then. and since i was already chest deep in the damn water/sewage, i thought "what the hell" and suggested to shan that she frogstyle from behind the drums and i'll backstroke from the front. we got it back across faster than before, but i got up from the water with my thighs tired as hell. my first sentence when i got back out was "i smell wonderful!" after that was the washing up then lunch. i took 15 mins to get all the water snails and algae and sand and mud from my shoes off. by then everyone was eating lunch and i was the last to get my food. i swore to myself then that i wouldn't enter that goddamned and godforsaken body of liquid manure again. and as always, the man upstairs always loves to play jokes on me. this wasn't the first time he sabotaged me, and i certainly don't think it'll be the last. i found out later not only i'll have to enter that shit hole again, but i'll have to enter it twice: once for some thing where we had a rope across its surface and i had to use the rope and wade across, second time for the rafting thing and this time we had to keep a piece of toilet roll dry. so, i got into the water, twice. this time i went barefoot to preserve my shoes. i sank into the mud almost knee deep and it was disgusting warm. i came out and since it was a team challenge and these were all obstacle course challenge stations, there was no time to hose down the mud so i just carried on with the rest of the program.

i followed with the tyre challenge where we had to get our team across a series of tyres without stepping on the ground with the aid of only 2 planks of wood. thank god for our team which had people with good balance and mainly gymnasts, haha. next was the canoeing challenge in which we had to launch our boat from muddy shallow water, cut through a maze of water hyacinths and later through open water to the opposing shore and get off, touch a tree, and paddle back again. my partner was jon chan and together we were the fastest man! we used brute force to beat our way through the water plants blocking our canoe and sprinted the boat to the shore and just as we were reaching, we stuck out a leg and slowed down the canoe and upon grounding the boat, we hopped out. it was all in style, haha. on the return journey we sprinted so fast to use our kinetic energy to cut a path back through the water plants without getting stuck. we did so well that i found that i had blisters on my fingers where i gripped the paddle.

the rest of the day was uneventful except for the part where we were clearing up the various stations and i was helping them to dismantle the rafts. i had to carry back the long poles of wood and i asked for them to put some poles of wood into my hands as i held them outstretched. the girls obliged, but all too willingly. they piled the whole damn pile unto my hands and i could hardly move a step! it didn't help that shufang, tini, cheryl, shan were all carrying either no poles or just one pole in the beginning and were chit chatting behind me. they all took advantage la. hmph. in the end that pile proved too heavy for me to handle and they had to each take 1 or 2 poles each before i could go on. like i was trying to demonstrate how "strong" i was la. my hand was shaking when i queued up for my food for dinner later.

the night campfire was damn cool though, though my team's performance left something to be desired as we told gruesome baby jokes. luckily i took the role of saying the confucius jokes which were actually funny. after most of them went off to their tents, a small group of us stayed back around the fire to watch the stars and tell ghost stories. it was all very, breath-taking. i won't be forgetting about that part of the expedition in a hurry, lying down on a ground sheet with your friends, looking up into the night sky and seeing all the bright stars. like, wow. but the ghost story part was pretty funny, with cheryl covering her ears cause she didn't wanna hear! hahah. later, derek, brian, jon chan, tini, shufang and i decided to sleep under the stars. the clouds really cleared then, and we got to see everything! tini, shufang and i talked abit and though we didn't manage to find out alot of so called secrets about each other, i thought it was pretty cool that one could sit in front of a blazing fire with the beautiful stars above and talk with one's friends. with shan's borrowed amplifier we had good music as we watched for shooting stars.

the next day was pretty mundane as we packed up the campsite and visited the musuem where they showed us gruesome acts of how they like, castrated bulls and pigs, and how they dissected rabbits. we moved on to see the rabbits and goats letter. i even held one and took a picture! they were like so cute. from there we took a bus home to singapore and god i can't tell you how relieved i was when i managed to clear customs. i shan't name names, but if you wanna know more, come ask me, haha. oh and i loved the sight of high rise HDB flats. and the fact there were no more puchis! haha, it's great to be back.

gee i'm tired after typing all this. aren't you tired of reading all this? lol, if you're still with me, tag me if you're game. if not, shoo, and good night! =)

::echoes::

_{regarding you: i've had had more good news than i've had in a long while. i'm contented i guess to hear what i hear. but that still doesn't leave me with answers as to what i should do about my feelings for you. maybe if i pretend long enough i can hope the feelings wear off? yeah. i don't know. anything.
anymore.}


`donovan. |7:49 PM|

Tuesday, December 07, 2004 [[*adeiu]]


i'm goign off for yet another expedition. this time it's the farmland one. haha i'll be off with a whole group of friends i know in the expedition so it promises to be fun and a great way to bond with friends. woohoo. seeya on the 10th.


`donovan. |7:08 PM|

Monday, December 06, 2004 [[*down to da east side]]


today was a fun day. i started off with 05:1 planning in the morning till about 12, before going down all the way to hougang for lunch with marcus, huishan and cheryl. (i suggested town cause it was nearer but noooo, shan had to drag me down to hougang.. haha kiddin) gughan met up with us later then after parting ways with marcus, gughan and i followed shan and cheryl to the polyclinic to get their med check for abit, then yan finally arrived. the black and i then left for his house where we chilled and caught up with each other. all in all, compared with the rest of the last few days where i was stuck going out to town (again...) or at home, it was a welcome change to go to the east side of singapore amidst pleasureable company. (must meet ya more often yan!)

oh and useless fact for the day: now i know it takes me exactly one hour to travel from kovan to jurong. wow.

sigh, more 05:1 planning tomorrow. must start working on the furniture list for the new council room. oh and movement and security, or otherwise known as *anti-zhao, can finally start work on 05:1.


`donovan. |7:56 PM|

Sunday, December 05, 2004 [[*they swirl above me, pretty things]]


felt lousy since last night till this morning. i spent the night calling clarrisa then derek, but derek didn't pick up, so i called louis instead. i spent the morning sms-ing clar, louis and shufang, all in a bid to sort this out but i find i still dont feel any better. at least i dont feel as lousy as i did last night, but i feel nothing still. maybe i'm too.. how do i put it, kan chiong? or am i reading correctly into your actions? maybe i read too much. are you dropping hints? or is it just me imagining things not there. gawd i hate mind games. i just felt like asking someone to put me outtamy misery last night. and funny thing is these moods are like swinging. at times i'm ok, others i just suddenly plummet down. talk about mood swings man. i just hate such days.

<sub>should i? shouldn't i? sad? maybe. desperate? haha, maybe. paranoid? maybe. confused?

definitely.</sub>


`donovan. |1:00 PM|

Saturday, December 04, 2004 [[]]


<sub>In Loving Memory - Alterbridge

Thanks for all you've done
I've missed you for so long
I can't believe you're gone
You still live in me
I feel you in the wind
You guide me constantly

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
And I'll come home and I miss your face so
Smiling down on me
I close my eyes to see

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I carry the things that remind me of you
In loving memory of
The one that was so true
Your were as kind as you could be
And even though you're gone
You still mean the world to me

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
But now I come home and it's not the same, no
It feels empty and alone
I can't believe you're gone

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I'm glad he set you free from sorrow
I'll still love you more tomorrow
And you will be here with me still

And what you did you did with feeling
And you always found the meaning
And you always will
And you always will
And you always will

Ooo

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me</sub>




`donovan. |11:15 PM|

Friday, December 03, 2004 [[]]


just couldn't resist. such a pretty song. credits to cheryl for introducing it to me.

<sub>angels or devils - dishwalla

this is the last time
that I'm ever gonna come here tonight
this is the last time - I will fall
into a place that fails us all - inside
I can see the pain in you
and I can see the love in you
but fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time
the angels they burn inside for us
are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down
come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold
this is the last time
that I'm ever gonna give in tonight
are there angels or devils crawling here?
I just want to know what blurs and what is clear - to see
well I can see the pain in you
and I can see the love in you
and fighting all the demons will take time
it will take time
the angels they burn inside for us
and are we ever
are we ever gonna learn to fly
the devils they burn inside of us
are we ever gonna come back down - come around
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could break us
if I were to give in - give it up
- and then
take a breath - make it deep
cause it might be the last one you get
be the last one
it could make us cold
you know that they could make us cold
I'm always gonna worry about the things that could make us cold</sub>




`donovan. |1:12 AM|

Thursday, December 02, 2004 [[]]


i'm home.


`donovan. |4:13 PM|